I have a problem because I work in Beijing, but I have a daughter who is studying in my hometown, she is 7 weeks old and in the first grade.
- I’m confused about how to communicate with her better, but I can’t bring her with me, so far.
- Wouldn’t they be better off?
- You learn from him, but I don’t want him to play that.
How to communicate with children when a couple is facing divorce
I’m confused about how to communicate with her better, but I can’t bring her with me, so far.
That’s the condition, right? Yes, one of the conditions is the policy, because if you go to school in Beijing. In the future, we still have to go back home to take the exams, so of course we advocate that parents stay with their children, which is the best choice.
But if the conditions are limited, there is really no way to solve this problem? We also do not need to put it so big, is to emphasize the pain of this so serious, because I see you ask me questions when the tears are already coming out, can not solve the problem we do not care about him.
Put aside, we will be within the scope of this can be solved, how we try to do better? And then there is his father. Dad with you or with him. We are three places divorced yet hahahahaha happy double hehehe.
Do not create a feeling of business spring and sadness for the child, can you make this child feel? The beauty of life. Your father and I, even if we are separated, the two of us will still love you, it has nothing to do with you.
That’s between us adults. But we will always have love for you, we used to say that parents are very important to their children’s company amount, if this parent does not do a good job, how much damage will be done to the child? But in fact, if you think about it.
Confucius, he was also a single-parent family, Mencius was also a single-parent family, Wang Yangming was also basically a single-parent family, and you think about those in the war and warfare. Those children whose parents died.
Wouldn’t they be better off?
So even if the parents are not in, simply never saw the child can also grow up healthy. What is the core? How does his heart view the relationship between his parents and him?
You see, there are many children without parents, he will say, “Mom is in heaven, right, taking care of me, when he can think of this thing, he can also feel the love from his mother.
So if we keep emphasizing this thing at home. Say, look, your mother is not around, right, the child really pity your mother, always say this word, the child will slowly identify with this feeling, but in fact if you tell him, you say.
I love you, Mom, no matter where you are, Mom loves you. Right, we talk every week. There are many homes where the mother is with the child and still hurts the child every day? Moms don’t hurt their children any less than others, do they?
That’s what I’m talking about. I don’t know how to communicate with him, why? I just feel that the sky is the limit and I don’t know how to monitor what he says. That’s not a problem. Children say things that you do not understand, it is normal, because the child’s world is much more developed than you.
Is not a lot of games I do not know, he played especially well, finished the ipad I can not play. I think he told me this and tell you how to use it. So isn’t that good communication?
You learn from him, but I don’t want him to play that.
When you say I don’t know how to communicate, it’s actually because you don’t realize what it is to be a parent is a bit a bit unaware. Then everyone seems to. The natural belief is that being a parent is to control him, don’t do this, don’t do that, don’t do that all day long tell him not to do anything, but we don’t know what parents really want to do?
The most important thing in home education is love and boundaries, both of these things are to have, and then in the process of establishing this, the core of the driving force.
First of all, you have to spare no effort to express love, so that the child knows that parents will always love him and always support him, this is the most important point. Then, secondly, let him feel a sense of value. That is, you can make him feel the contribution he makes to the family.
His contribution to the community, he is working hard to progress, others can see this to be a sense of value. Then the third is to help him understand the difficulties encountered in the learning process, and then develop a lifelong growth mindset, you are the best toy for your child.
How to develop children’s social skills? I’ve written a book called Reading Children’s Hearts, and I think these books may be helpful for you. You go back and read him well, and then use his methods to do.
You will feel the fun. Don’t be so confused because you are like a little girl who has gone the wrong way and hasn’t come home yet. The lost kind of feeling, right?
So there’s a lot parents can do, and you’re in an emotional slump. Don’t neglect to communicate with your child because of this, you need to take more time out to talk to him, okay? Read books to light up your life.