It is that we have listened to many books that talk about raising children. But the child is already big, he has reached adolescence, then many of our critical period has passed away, then combing many methods on.
- Can not keep up with him, has begun to have rebellious ah, practice learning to play games.
- Then in the morning you moisturize it out, and after moisturizing it out you think that kid is fighting again.
- So don’t ever think.
How to communicate with rebellious children
Can not keep up with him, has begun to have rebellious ah, practice learning to play games.
My question is is there still a chance? Or is that. Can only let him nearly flowering, on the time has passed, he already is not want to read, see how you nearly flowering. This life, is always a process of recent flowering, you for your family’s financial situation, is not recent flowering?
It’s all about the quiet generation of flowers, but the key is how the quiet generation of flowers blooms. Then if you can change your approach, you can interact with him in a more positive way.
Care for him. And then understand him, communicate with him, travel with him, that is also a kind of recent flowering method, so the word recent flowering is too ambiguous. We recently talked about a book that might be helpful to you, called Decoding Adolescence.
It’s specifically about this whole puberty thing, and the author of that book is one himself. It must be much worse than your son, because he is an orphan. The orphan grew up in an orphanage and was abused by other older children, and then the thorns blew up in his body forever, every time he went to a foster home.
Whenever you go to a foster home, you start to have trouble with people. Every time he entered that home, he began to calculate how many days they will kick me out, so he has been every day every day, until he met a last father. The most important thing is that he has a method. That child ended up in jail is? He drank and drove without a license.
After he was caught in jail, he called his dad and said, “Come and bail me out,” and his dad said, “Stay there tonight because you’ve done something wrong. I’ll come and keep you tomorrow morning.
Then in the morning you moisturize it out, and after moisturizing it out you think that kid is fighting again.
doing drugs, stealing, driving recklessly, and in our opinion think this kid is hopeless. Then the father called him in, picked him up from jail and talked to him, saying you are the only trouble you have, but we are your only chance.
That’s all he said. It changed the child, who at the time of writing this book was already a Harvard scholar, specializing in adolescent issues, and wrote a very good book. So decoding adolescence is telling us that even when we reach adolescence, this child has made so many mistakes before, but he still needs an adult.
The child needs an adult who can explain the reasoning to him, and then patiently accompany him to grow up, the child than we think. To be more in need of parental companionship.
A great deal of anxiety in adolescence comes from feeling terrified that he may soon have to leave the house. He is especially worried that he won’t have more time for his parents, but adolescents don’t talk about it.
The way they show it is by constantly pushing you, you get away from me you you leave me alone. When he keeps doing this action, he is actually constantly testing. Will my parents help me or not? Here is a good analogy, this author went to ride that roller coaster, a very dangerous wooden roller coaster, and then went up after very nervous because of the scary. Found no seat belt, only a pressure bar.
Is the head over a lever, pressed on the leg. Then he repeatedly pushed the lever, and kept pushing, and kept pushing, and then he said, this process of pushing the lever is to try this lever in the end is not a safe process.
The same, so when an adolescent child constantly provoke his parents, constantly push his parents constantly do this test, in fact, he wants to see whether the lever is firm or not?
So don’t ever think.
Before what you will still do, toys did not keep up, training children’s social skills did not keep up, positive discipline did not keep up with the wow. Anyway, what about the teacher’s office book club?
It’s so late, it’s over. Right, there is no relationship. This has nothing to do with when it started. Parents wake up, parents realize their own responsibility, you can find that correct posture of recent flowering. Recent blossoming is not about doing nothing.
It’s not a continuation of the wrong methods of the past, but you have to find a right method to be able to learn to work gradually with patience, that’s the right posture. Okay?
So there is a chance that there is a chance at all, so don’t feel powerless to do anything about it. All right, thanks. Read books to light up your life.